all the heated debates about iraq have caused many americans here to think that several of us anti bush guys hate america and hate americans.. this is not the case!
i want to state emphatically that the us is a great country with great people!
i have lived in ny for 3 years and had a fantastic time there.
Us big old, bad old, Americans.
We're not unlike you. We drink, eat, have shelter, and live. We want to live in peace and harmony. Our expectations, like yours or anybody else's ar the same. Our government has taken over.. and we just are too apathetic to enforce our rights. Nothing new, nothing surprising. They've been eroding our rights for the last five years, and I think everyone's too apathetic to stop it.
Surprise!
Country Girl
yes, folks ... i was shocked, horrified, and dumbfounded by what took place this evening.
a chapter right out of george orwell's 1984 ... big brother listens in for quality assurance.
even my radical right-wing conservative republican sensibilities were shaken to the ground.
I suggest that we *all* move to an island that isn't under American control. It's scary what is going on right now, and the average American doesn't even think twice about it. They are so apathetic it's sickening.
i'm sure all of us were loyal at one time to the watchtower, believing in all of it.
(some of us probaly hated it from day one as well but, ).
what were some of the first things that happened or were said, that made you to start doubting it and beginning the loss of your loyalty to the organization ??????.
I've always been intuitive. That must come with being an artist. I can feel bad vibrations at the drop of a hat. I can sense things that others might miss, and at first I thought I was crazy. I've learned to trust my intuition since then, because it mostly proves right.
My first doubt came when I was 9 years old and I checked out from the Kingdom Hall library "The Origin of Species" by Charles Darwin. I read it front to back at 9 years old. I guess nobody missed it, cuz it was still in my possession twenty years later. Later that year, at 10 years old, I realized that a lot of the dog manure they were telling me didn't make a lot of sense. YOu see, I read the Bible during the meetings. I didn't have a complete understanding of it, I just only KNEW that it wasn't right.
I sat through the same boring meetings ya'll sat through.. and it was as boring to me as it is to you now.... the same drone of the speaker, the same songs (copied from other religions) but it never struck me that this was a cult.
So.. now.. I still think JW's are nuts.. and they are a cult.. and that's just how it is.
CG
first of all, let me say that many, if not most, of my memories of abuse and early childhood were recovered.
some people feel that this diminishes my experience, or in some way denies what happened.
i suffered from major depression and was quite suicidal for 2 years before something happened to trigger my memories.
Dear Chris:
Thank you for sharing your thoughts, expressions, and memories here. As you can see, it has benefitted a great many people, impressed a lot of others, and was a downright courageous thing to do. It was hard, I am sure, but I have hoped throughout your long odyssey with these memories that you have kept in mind the thought that even though these memories have arrived, they are in the past and bringing them out now will only make you stronger as you deal with them, helped ground you, and helped you realize that talking about them only makes the power that they have over you grow weaker. Of course you know that...
I think you are a very courageous and wonderful writer. It took some "brass ones" to get out here on the Internet and talk about this stuff. But I think you have a good motive behind you: you want to help people to UNDERSTAND what a child goes through when sexual, physical, emotioanal, and mental abuse are involved. I loved your story. It shocked me: broke my heart and made me cry for my own lost innocence.. it hit a place deep in my soul. I couldn't write a thing about it for two days until I had digested it and taken it into my own place and compared it.. and realized that even if my own abuse only happened one time, and wasn't as severe as yours, we both had a lot of the same feelings. That made me feel a lot better. I think you have a wonderful talent, and I wouldn't be surprised if you wrote a book about it, after you deal with it all, and that it was on a best seller list. You have a wonderful sense of words.. and a wonderful truthfulness that shines beyond any words or feelings you might capture on paper. Just being honest and capturing that sense of feelings in words is very hard to do: and you are remarkable at it. It isn't flatlined.. and it isn't porno.. it's just captured exactly how you felt about it as a child: without cynical adult input, or hatred or bitterness. Just as it was, in your view, at the time. Priceless. You have a fine talent.. and I hope you pursue that.
I think you have the makings of a very fine book, biographical, and I don't think anyone would hesitate to agree with me. Do it, Chris. I honestly believe that if you could find out more about your family through law enforcement or whatever resources are available that this might be a remarkable book.. geneology.. interviews.. etc. I think it would be cathartic for you as long as you don't RELIVE it.. which might present a problem.... But I think Nina, your adoring wife, will help you through it, and your book would be a best seller. I believe it.
Country Girl
yes, folks ... i was shocked, horrified, and dumbfounded by what took place this evening.
a chapter right out of george orwell's 1984 ... big brother listens in for quality assurance.
even my radical right-wing conservative republican sensibilities were shaken to the ground.
Amazing:
If people read the wording of the Patriot Act, they would not be surprised at *anything* the government can get away with in the next years... Here is a link to the ACLU site involving the Patriot Act which will help you to better understand what we, as an American people, are up against:
It's pretty frightening.
CG
ok, not too much to report for today's session except for one part.
don't have my program in front of me but the part had another co doing it and it had to do with apostates, satan, and the media.
boy did he tear into the apostates and the media.
They can logically conclude..(woops, sorry, they don't *do* logistics) then, that whenever the media has anything *good* to say about them, it's "lies, all lies"? That when the media reports on their troubles in Russia and France, it's just lies. Hmm..
Country girl
i think for me, it is if someone doesn't believe that what i say is sincere or honest.
i find that insulting.
what about you??
I had a very abusive boyfriend in high school. He slapped me in front of my friends and then told me that my "p***y (personal tidbits) was so rotten that it had maggots."
Funny thing: we were fighting because I wouldn't give up my virginity to him. Yes. Nice little JW girl, but slightly on the fringe.
CG
in around 2 hours time i am going to be meeting my 'real' father, whom i have never met.. .
i tracked him down via the net a couple of months ago and have been writing and phoning each other ever since.
today is d-day, and at this moment i am shaking like a leaf!
Good luck! I was watching reunion shows on television yesterday, and I was bawling. I am so happy for you, and I hope that this meeting turns out to be the open door to much love and joy in your life.
Country Girl
being gay is a choice by david cornwell
a different perspective on the old argument
have you ever heard a person make this statement?
I have read a few articles on "situational homosexuality", and find that a pretty fascinating aspect of human sexuality. That, in the case where sexual partners were limited to those of the same sex (prisons, all male, all girl, schools, etc.), that intense sexual, emotional, and profound relationships were engaged in by those who considered themselves, outside of the situation, heterosexual. I found even more information, as equally fascinating, on the "sexual continuum":
http://www.superdrewby.com/column/sexuality.shtml
Country Girl
in the movie 'my blue heaven' steve martin's charactor claims, "everyone thinks they have a sense of humor, even when they don't!
" do you laugh easily and often?
i am always looking for new material and have about 150 jokes at my disposal.
A sense of humour is all I have. I became a clown because when I was a Greek girl growing up in the JW's, nobody took anything I said, or did, seriously. I became a clown in my family because it was a way to convey my growing hatred for the religion in a way that couldn't get me "marked" but would still let me let it out.
Country Girl
